Just need to talk
Most of you will not recognize my handle, it’s been a long time since I’ve frequented Talon Airgun’s forum. Those of you with sons will understand.
Perhaps this is not the place to post things like what I’m about to tell you, but because I don’t know any of you personally, it makes it a little easier to talk about.
I lost my son, Nick, to Colon Cancer September 26th. He died a week before his 30th birthday. He fought bravely through 5 years. Nine major surgeries, colostomy, ilieostomy, fistulas, …..whatever could make his life more miserable….he had to deal with. And he did all without a single complaint. Chemo, as well as the surgeries, did their best to challenge his faith, self esteem, physical appearance, and mental health. But he gave no ground. He was truly the most courageous, optimistic, and kind man I have ever known. He had a smile for everyone, no matter how badly he felt. I am so grateful to have had him as my son. And the loss I feel has no words. Sometimes I wonder if my tears will ever stop. The hole in my heart is dark, with no borders, and no bottom.
I pray none of you will ever experience so great a loss. Thanks for listening to an old man cry. God bless.
All Replies
Shakey
Man I don’t even know you nor do I have kids, however your story had me teary eyed
Hang in there my brother, and just remember the good times you have had with your son.
I feel for you and your family, it is so sad stuff like that happens to good people
SAW
Shaky. I too have lost family due to this disease, and there is no more painful feeling than knowing you are powerless to stop it.
My heart goes out to you.
Your son will always be with you, and you are going to remember things about him at the oddest times. Cherish those thoughts.
RR
It does not matter where you walk in life or how you live it, grief will always be a shared and personal moment for those that are part of it.
Read this post a few times now and only just got to the bottom, my thoughts as a farther goes out to you and your family, friends of your son.
Take the best of care and take each day as you see best to help you through this.
Ian
I’m saddened by your loss… your son is in a better place now and I’m glad you were blessed with nearly three decades together.
I remember when my grandfather passed and thought I would never get over it… now I have just great memories of him… that sentence made me choke up.
Wishing you and your family the best.
My thought’s are with you and your family.
Thank you all for your support. It means a lot.
my condolences….colon cancers are simply the worst, i have had two family members in our family taken by this horribly and painfull disease one i hardly knew but i remember well as i was a kid, but i do remember seing him shrink into nothing, and an uncle on my wifes side suffered the same, there is just no words that will help, there will always be a hole in your soul, remember the good times and look back at his life with a smile
Shaky, you chose here to air your grief and like good men and parents guys on here let you know they feel for you mate!I have a little boy 5 he is not out the woods yet,I know exactly what you feeling ,keep strong till you hold him again in a better place we all know is out there.Chris
Shaky I can’t imagine what you’re going through. All I can say is one of the things that helps me is knowing I will see my loved ones again when my time comes. My condolences. God bless you and peace be with you.
shaky,
Not to be insensitive because my heart goes out to you for your temporary loss. Now that your son has conquered the pain of a terrible disease it’s time to begin accumulating good memories to eventually share with him.
Get some fresh air as often as possible. Soak up some sunshine and use it to warm you during the times God provides the rain to refresh the grass, trees and flowers. When we can concentrate for a short time on other things we enjoy our minds become refreshed and open to our many fond memories of those we love.
Can you get out and shoot some targets? Do you bowl? What do you think about some of the newer contributions to TAG?
Sincerely,
Edmund
Lurker #1
Shaky
Although I follow this forum daily, have contributed little due to limited fluency in idioma.But I want to let my opinion, as you say we do not know, but for this kind of challenge there is no need, I’ve been through a similar problem with my firstborn, so I understand what your family passed.Fortunaty in my case was a final feliz.É a sadness when the kids go before their parents, know that nothing will compensate for the loss but you have my respect and solidarity.
Hugs,your friend from Brasil.
Shaky,
Cant imagine what your going through but i do so appreciate you reaching out and telling us your sons story.
I’m sorry for the very SAD news as i know all too well that CANCER is a BITCH of a disease. I just lost both of my grandparents to FORMS of cancer. I thought they would live forever. And now that i have a 3 year old son, i can’t imagine anything happening to him. I would trully be lost and would depend on GOD to bring me around.
So to you and your family, My condolences go out to each and every one of you as i know you have SUFFERED A GREAT LOSS.
MAY GOD BLESS
CEDRIC
Our condolences from myself and my wife. We have 2 daughters and 2 Grandkids and to lose one would be a heartbreak.
Our oldest daughter had attempted to take her life early this year due to stress, strain, and a severe lack of sleep (worsened by all the other factors) that she hid from everyone.
Thankfully, she did not succeed, and it was only due to our luck at noticing just a few small odditiess and putting it together in time to have the local Sheriff dept. stop her on a road during a search. (The dose of my heart rate pills and her thyroid meds was a fatal amount we were later told.)
We could have lost her, and that would have been painful.
We all feel grief for you and the rest of your family.
What a brave man he must have been. And so well loved.
It won’t be easy, but…
Cherish the good times and the love you all shared in the time you had together.
Let that empty void be filled with that love that is endless and may the darkness be lit again by the memories of those smiles that were shining his love for you in return.
God Bless
Bruce and Becky
p.s.
Thanks for sharing this, we hope it helps. It is most certainly the right place for it. You are as big a part of this group as much as any of us.
I shared my concern about my daughter soon after it had happened and it helped me to cope with it just to talk about it a bit. The encouragement from the TAG members was of great help too.
That Sucks,
Take care
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My grandfather died just a few weeks ago from cancer. It really is a horrible thing.
I remember hearing somewhere, “fathers should never have to bury their sons.” I think that is one of the most true things I have ever heard. My condolences man.